*If you have found this page while in search of PTSD treatments for yourself or others, I extend a special welcome to you. Nightmares, flashbacks, overwhelming hopelessness…you are not alone. Someday we WILL find a reliable treatment, perhaps even a cure. Until then, we have each other, friends. Please join me on my Facebook Blog, A Little Bent.

I have PTSD. After undergoing years of treatment in the form of therapy and pharmaceuticals, it just wasn’t enough. Despite my efforts, I still suffered from the overwhelming effects of PTSD.

Realizing that I was not alone in this, I decided to contribute to the cause of finding effective treatments, and hopefully find a treatment that worked for myself.

I sought out and volunteered for three medical research studies; one PTSD brain imaging study, and two separate drug trials. I blogged throughout the studies, recording every poke, prod and challenge, a project lasting for almost 2 years.

This website is one of the few online chronicles addressing the other side of PTSD research – the HUMAN side.

Rarely do you hear about clinical trials from the perspective of a participant. In almost every case coverage is devoted to results (good or bad), and are delivered from paid spokespeople or researchers. This is what it’s like to be on the receiving end of these trials.

While the studies did not end as I had hoped, I do hope that this narrative does help put a face to PTSD research and the need to protect the safety and well-being of research subjects. If you have PTSD, I encourage you to read through my posts – a lot was written about the roaring return of my most debilitating symptoms of PTSD during the trials and how I worked through them.

Click below to read about my experiences as a volunteer research subject:


News coverage after an FDA Investigation and studies were halted: